6 Ridiculous [ly Real] Fears

What are the ridiculous things you fear? The ones that maybe you don’t confess to people right away for fear they’ll look at you funny or think you’re out of your living mind? Well, folks these are mine, in all of my crazy glory. I know they’re silly, but I’m still afraid of them for one reason or another. People are scared of what they’re scared of, OK?! Tell me what your weird, irrational fears are in the comments, please. Because I, like the rest of society live for ridiculousness!

especially strollers and escalators

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Oh my good lord, the anxiety I have while watching mothers with their children on escalators. Maybe I was a horrible child but my parents put the fear of god in me over escalators and the threat always came down to I would get sucked into it… Then I see people take their children IN STROLLERS on these devices! WHAT IF YOUR BABY FALLS OUT?! ARE YOU CRAZY?!

Losing a tooth

Something so terrifying about losing a tooth and the fear is always that it’s going to be the front one. Many a sleepless nights were due to dreams that woke me in a cold sweat that my tooth just randomly fell out. First off that doesn’t happen and second I have really good oral hygiene!

Someone in the back of your car

Maybe I’m just a worrisome person but it happens in every terrible 80s horror film where there is a man, most likely with a chainsaw, in your backseat. Every SVU episode and father warn against the dangers of a mass-murderer stowing away in your trunk so they could kill you, or maybe it’s just my dad…

Holding a baby

Very delicate, precious creatures that can’t hold their own heads up. I have watched my phone go down the steps like a slinky. So holding a new born child isn’t really for me… I like it when they have a little more muscle control thanks. And when I am forced to hold a baby I am usually the person who makes them cry or I get made fun of because it looks like I’m holding a vase that should be on display at the Smithsonian.

Driving behind a gas truck

Especially with the kid who is driving his mom’s Neon behind me like he is an extra in Tokyo Drift, flammable gas is not the best kind of truck to be behind. It’s mildly unnerving because I don’t want to reenact the scene from Final Destination either. Plus it is always either in traffic or construction that I am surrounded by this explosive materials, with no where to go quickly.

Doing shit like this

What is wrong with people? I get nauseous when I drive on back roads. So throwing me in a clear plexiglass box that hangs hundreds of feet in the air… I can live without.

So now that you all know I’m nuts I’d love to hear more about the crazy that goes on in your heads! So all 4 people who read this, comment below because I can’t wait to hear! Until next time my weird friends, stay sane, or fake it til they believe you!




3 thoughts on “6 Ridiculous [ly Real] Fears

  1. I’m dying laughing at all of these. Your voice REALLY came through in this post–so fantastic.

    I’m afraid of:
    1. That creepy barn on the way back from my grams house.
    2. Getting attacked in the tub (thanks Nightmare on Elm St).
    3. The possibility of “something” looming behind any and all curtains.
    4. Back seat men (see above article).
    5. Holes in ceilings I can’t see into properly.
    6. Windows on country homes–where you can’t see out of them properly, because it’s so dark outside.
    7. Sewer/subway grates in the city (ESPECIALLY if they’re the ones with the red light under it).

  2. Wow these are AWESOME! I loved the fear of holding a baby that video was outrageous!! Hmmm I would have to say one of my fears is Haunted Houses. So silly I know. But ever since my Dad took me in one when I was a toddler I can’t erase the horrific scenes.

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