Levels of Drunk Based Off of Things You Lose (as told by puppies)

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We do and say silly things when we drink, for some of us that is an understatement. Upon doing that there are things that we tend to lose, for lack of a better word. So remember, get friends who know when to take you home and lock you up.

Phone

Maybe your bestie has it, nope. Maybe you left it in the bathroom, not there. The bartender has it… um no. That guy who took your picture must still have it, shit.. OH WAIT, it’s in your back pocket.

Ability to Dance

You think you look like Queen B, but really your moves are going to get dancing and rock & roll banded from you town. Get jiggy with it girlfriend.

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Debit Card

Put it this way, the only bars you should go to are the ones where the bartender physically holds your card until you close your tab. You can’t be held responsible for such things.

Friends

You turn around and they aren’t there! What the hell?! Why would they leave you?? I mean you did leave an go to a bar 3 blocks away BUT STILL!

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Virginity

Thanks for this one Carisa.. but we aren’t going there, a little too messy for most but makes for a good story… many years from now…

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Dinner

Getting sick was inevitable especially when you thought polishing off a bottle 99 Bananas by yourself was a good and noble idea. Party on Garth.

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Dignity

You were charming when you complimented the girl on her fabulous lipstick, the charm wore off when you decided to “Coyote Ugly” the bar. Please don’t slap your thighs again.

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Friendships

Once you become “that girl” that everyone else has to babysit, you start to lose friends, quickly. Especially when you’re over the age of 22 or someones mom.

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Bar Fight

Cool it Steve Austin, I know your beer muscles make you feel like your fixin’ to open up a can of whoop-ass!, but I promise you, you’ll just look like a drunk redneck

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Ability to go back into a bar

Saturday night plan making gets awkward because the “place we do not speak of” can’t be mentioned. Your drunk ass got yourself banned for life (I think that was the phrasing the cop used) so now no one can go back.

The 40 Greatest Dog GIFs Of All Time

Memory of the Night

There is a reason that the whole table of people is staring at your at breakfast because they know how you got that bruise on your leg and why your one eyebrow is gone.

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